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I have just boldly ventured deeper into the digital age – the "third industrial revolution", as they say.  What was the second?  I think I missed something between the steam engine and the 3D printer...
 

I'm a self-confessed techno-phobe, so this is somewhat of a big deal for me.  Yes, I have a cell phone - which the nice lady at the Genius Bar set up (is that pretentious or what?!).  And I have a personal computer, which my paid tech support assembled.  Of course I love toys - provided someone else sets them up and gets them working for me.  That's why the fact that this blog actually functions is next door to a miracle.

I was generously gifted this past Christmas with an iPod.  A device that I had no idea how to use.  (The batteries still work in my Sony Walkman.)  Such a tiny little piece of metal, yet so intimidating.  It sat idle for over a month, before I found my courage.  It came with instructions on how to download iTunes, and then it was off to the merry, old land of YouTube, to find an appropriate Wizard.

YouTube is my personal encyclopedia for everything.  (If you're interested, I've got a video bookmarked for how to fold a fitted sheet that works every time.)  I found excellent instruction for the use of my new iPod – how to download songs from my favorite CDs; how to feed Apple $1.29 every 60 seconds.  I happily discovered that my new toy is a cinch to use.  But I must say, I found it a bit perturbing that the voice of my instructor could not have been more than 10 years old.  Fine for her – she doesn't have a full-time job, a house to run, and a dependant cat.

I spent a morning going through all my CDs and shopping iTunes, choosing just the right mix of songs to get me through my morning and evening commutes.  Trust me, it was worth the time.  There are several things I dislike about public transit, not the least of which is the way it sounds. Oh, not the train - the train itself is fine, except for that irritating automated lady's voice that says the doors will open on the right.  (What if I'm facing the other way?)  I can tune her out.  It's the passengers causing the all the noise pollution.

It never fails.  If I'm lucky enough to get a seat, I settle in comfortably, just in time to realize that someone in my vicinity is listening to their portable music player at 150 decibels.  And it's never pleasant music - it does not have a beat and you can't dance to it.  It's always some endless, repetitive, banging sound, occasionally accompanied by yelling or grunting.  I take some consolation in the fact that whoever is generating the offending racket is gradually sacrificing their hearing to it.  But in the meantime, why do they always have to sit/stand near me?

A sound I hate even more is that which emanates from someone who has never heard of Kleenex.  Constant wet, sniffling drives me insane.  I'm tempted to carry around a little package of tissue to offer these folks, but I worry that if a sniffer says 'thank you', instead of me saying 'you're welcome', I'll blurt out the truth – I wasn't doing it to be courteous, it's because they're grossing me out with that disgusting noise.  That might be considered bad form.

Another thing I haven't figured out is why I am so often riding in the same car as a complete nut-job.  The one who talks or sings to himself with no inhibitions, and later begs everyone for money.  As a Christian, I think they need assistance and prayers.  But as a normal, everyday, human, I also think I'd like to get off the train and wait for the next one.  Now that I have my iPod, all I have to do is tap the little plus sign to increase the volume.

A minor snag regarding the use of anything with earphones, though...On my way home from work Monday, riding the subway, I was so absorbed in the music, and without hearing those irritating station announcements, I missed my stop.

 

One Thing That >50 Me Has Learned Along the Way...

Everyone should be taught elevator etiquette.  Just in case Mom, Dad or Aunt Minnie didn't tell you, if you stick your arm between the closing doors of an elevator to prevent it from leaving without you, that elevator had better be empty.  If it's not, then the act is impossibly rude.  You're holding other people up.  Wait for the next one.  I would cheerfully see all elevator doors retrofitted with razor-sharp edges and the ability to close 50x faster than the ones on the Enterprise.